Topping off my coffee

The following is a stale idea for a post I jotted down in a few moments of silent rage a few years ago. It sounds like nitpicking, but I’m curious to see if anyone feels the same way. I attempt to shoehorn a customer service takeaway at the end.

When I have coffee that isn’t from an AeroPress1, I might add cream and sugar (usually two each). The ratio of coffee/cream/sugar is balanced to my liking. That means I’d only request more coffee at a restaurant if my mug is empty.

If the server tops it off when my mug is three quarters full, the ratio is skewed!

Instead of offering more coffee (my preference), some places begin pouring proactively.2 I find those interactions “rough”, mentally. I don’t interrupt when they’re already in the motion (they’re almost done anyway), so I bite my tongue and smile politely.

As they walk away, I’m thinking, “The ratio got skewed!”

Anyway. Here are my options if I’m not sitting in the middle of a room (the first is direct, the rest are passive):

  • Interrupt the server before the ratio-skewing liquid exits the larger vessel.
  • Keep the mug far from reach of the server, then relocate near the edge of the table when I’d like a refill.
  • Leave a napkin (or something) over my coffee mug to indicate I don’t want a refill.
  • Flip a coin to decide if I should add more cream and sugar, then hope for the best.

What would you do?

It’s “strange” (read: embarrassing) to read this post because this entire circumstance involves my personal preference. But, it might be a good takeaway for customer service: when in doubt, ask before taking action. I’ll appreciate that you’re attentive!

P.S. I promise I appreciate servers, even if they don’t ask before pouring. That’s still preferred over avoidance. 🙂


  1. e.g. Drip coffee at a restaurant or catered event. 
  2. If I’m mid-conversation with someone else, it’s likely that the server doesn’t want to be rude. I totally understand. 

Be like Uncle Leo

This evening, I returned from a brief trip to a popular discount store to buy a pack of candelabra light bulbs. Since it was Saturday around 19:30, it was packed. All cashiers had 4–10 people in each line. Self-checkout registers were in use, too.

When I was in line, there were two people ahead of me. The first person being rung up ended up requesting two transactions, and the cashier was fine with it. That took about six minutes.

The cashier greeted the person in front of me, and rung them up fairly quickly.

Now it was my turn. Before the cashier rung up item, a colleague started griping to her about something that occurred elsewhere in the store. It wasn’t directly related to work.

My biggest concern: she did not acknowledge me until she handed me the receipt. Sadness.

Takeaways

Greet each customer if they aren’t preoccupied, especially when working at a register. Even if it’s a repeat customer, it could be the first interaction with you.

It’s more difficult to gain a new customer than retain existing customers. We’re creatures of habit, and trying someplace new needs to be as welcoming as possible.1

People watch the way you treat other customers while waiting in line, and can see when they’re snubbed. (If they aren’t on their phone or talking with others, they’re more susceptible.)

If you don’t know an existing customer, treat them as a brand new customer, and strive for a great first impression. You have no idea:

  • If they’ve had rough experiences in the past at your store.
  • How much they’ve spent there.
  • About their influence with other family, friends, and colleagues.
  • If they’ll discuss their experience coherently somewhere on the internet. (For example, anyone can create a free blog or website at WordPress.com!)

Disclaimer: I’m a Happiness Engineer (Community Guardian) at Automattic, the people behind WordPress.com (W) and other fantastic services. 🙂


  1. I’m not a new customer, but this point is worth mentioning. 

Lyft: My first three experiences

A few colleagues used Lyft from their phones while I was in San Francisco for UserConf in November 2014. However, I won’t count that as my first experience because I didn’t use it on my iPhone.

I worked a couple of shifts at the WordPress booth (by WordPress.com)1 at NAMM 2016 in Anaheim on Thursday and Friday, January 21st and 22nd.

A day or two earlier, I installed Lyft.

Along with my pal, Ryan Cowles, we took public transportation from Pasadena to Anaheim early Thursday morning.2 After arriving at ARTIC (Anaheim), we went to the pickup area, and I requested a Lyft driver. 3 minutes — cool!

The time estimate was accurate, and I also received a text messsage right when we saw the car. Nice. Davey was friendly, and the drive was smooth.

I love everything about the ride history shown in the Lyft app. Davey drove us from ARTIC to Anaheim Marriott Suites in eleven minutes. 🙂

Next, I decided to test Lyft’s Lost & Found procedure.

Not.

As we tried to find the place to get our exhibitor badges, it took me about five minutes to realize that I forgot my DSLR camera in his car.3

Doing my best to stay calm, I opened the Lyft app, went to Ride History, and spotted “Find lost item” at the bottom. I described my lost item, entered my Google Voice number, and waited.

Eight minutes after Hideto dropped us off, he returned my call, and said he could meet me where we were earlier. Happy ending! He was super cool about it, too.

With my camera in hands, I was like:

On Saturday morning, the third driver (Joshua) picked me up at Marriott Anaheim Suites for part of my journey back to Pasadena. Really nice person, incredibly gregarious (despite being sleep deprived), and the drive was smooth.

I thoroughly enjoyed my three Lyft experiences. Highly recommended!


  1. I’ll save that for a separate post. 
  2. Ryan took a couple of cool photos: Metrolink, and Track 1 to Los Angeles
  3. Canon EOS 40D + Sigma 30mm f/1.4. 

Start with Heart

Take a deep breath. Imagine how you want things to unfold in the best version of the future. Or ask the other person what outcome they’d like to see.

It’s not about being right.

It’s about making the right things happen.

Fantastic post by Julie Zhuo reminding us to foster alignment towards a positive conclusion.

Focus your energy into that correct outcome, even if it means pointing them elsewhere.

Full post: The First Step in Hard Conversations — The Year of the Looking Glass

PayPal, I’d like to use my password manager

After news broke of the eBay security breach, I updated my account passwords for eBay and PayPal1.

With my trusty password manager, KeePassX, I cloned my current PayPal entry in preparation to generate a new password. To my horror, I saw the following password requirement pop–up:

Screenshot: PayPal change password screen

I’d like to use much more than 20 characters, and not be able to easily type my password. Kthxbai. 🙂


  1. PayPal is owned by eBay Inc. 

We’ll do our best, but you can’t please everyone

I meant to post this insight from Marco Arment last year:

Some people will find things to complain about. […] You will never please everyone. You will never win that battle.

We’ll do our best in customer support, yet it’s inevitable that we’ll interact someone who is extremely upset with us.

Our patience and grace can win their hearts over; I’ve seen it many times, and we usually post it internally to remind ourselves why we carry on. (We call them “hugs”.) After a follow–up response, the customer apologizes for their crankiness, grateful for our help.

That’s why we’re some of the best in the industry. 🙂

In unfortunate and rare circumstances, when they’re angry and continue to berate us, it’s super helpful to know that we can regroup with our coworkers internally, analyze the situation, and decide that we can’t win ’em all.

“Can’t win ’em all? What does that mean?”

Our replies to that particular person will no longer help, and we close the email. If they show a change of heart and send a follow–up reply, we’re happy to revisit.

For what it’s worth, I assure you we do as much as we can before we get to that point.

If this interests you, we’d love for you to work with us, especially since we always need Happiness Engineers. 🙂

Don’t trust Amazon’s automotive part finder

Several months ago, I ordered a FRAM CF8392A Fresh Breeze Cabin Air Filter for Amy’s 2009 Toyota Corolla. Amazon’s part finder indicated that it would fit the car.

After checking FRAM’s official site, the correct one is the FRAM CF10285 Fresh Breeze Cabin Air Filter.

Sadly, I didn’t read the Amazon customer reviews for the CF8392A; at least one person left a comment that it would not fit a 2009 Corolla.

Another bummer — I can’t sell the brand new filter (which won’t fit our cars) on Amazon:

Please note: The item for which you have attempted to create a listing is a restricted item.

I’ll list the FRAM CF8392A Fresh Breeze Cabin Air Filter on eBay soon enough, but hopefully someone contacts me directly for it. 😛

LayerVault as a Remote Company

An excerpt from a cool post by Kelly Sutton, co–founder and CTO of LayerVault, on working remotely — my emphasis in bold:

Although many investors and founders poo-poo the idea of remote work, I’m convinced it can make a better company. A remote company is more resilient to internet downtime in the office, U.S. federal holidays, and more. Remote employees get to live their own lives on their own time, and produce better work as a result.

If you’re a founder and not hiring remote, you’re limiting your results.

My thoughts on NMX BlogWorld 2013

Brett Kelly and Bryan Villarin

Almost one month has passed and I’d say it’s a good time to share my meager notes of my experience at NMX BlogWorld 2013 in Las Vegas.

  • If you aren’t able to help a visitor with their super–specific question(s), give at least one takeaway so they don’t leave empty–handed. For example, someone’s blog was focused on browsing sites securely, and an Incognito window with Google Chrome was new to them. That was nifty.
  • For the most part, most attendees are shy. If someone glances in your direction, and they’re a few feet from your booth, introduce yourself or say “hello”. You never know.
  • WiFi will not work consistently.
  • Keep your laptop and phone charged.
  • Save a few relevant Twitter searches for the event/conference.
  • Bring business cards. I didn’t, and I won’t make that mistake again.
  • Carry a couple pens and pocket notebook.
  • After seeing a panel of speakers, open your notebook and write for 5–10 minutes about anything that comes to mind. Do the same thing at the end of the day. (This is also useful for everyday life.)

I also met Brett Kelly for the first time ever in real life and we took a photo. He’s super cool. (He spoke at “Productivity Power Panel: Learn the Tools, Tactics, & Workflows of Highly Productive Bloggers”, and I’ll post my notes from that separately.)

Overall, I had a great time working at the WordPress Happiness Bar in the exhibitors’ area with several other fine Automatticians, and I look forward to more opportunities like this in the future.